I miss my Barbies

I'm feeling nostalgic about my Barbies. I no longer have them. I outgrew them ages ago, but my parents kept them to give to my sister, who turns out is more of a tomboy than a girlie girl, so it was left untouched. It got move around a lot. My parents tried to find places to put it now that no one in our house no longer played with it.

I had loads of stuff for my Barbie. From a make shift house of cardboard, to bathroom sets complete with real running water, bedroom sets, desk sets, and tons of clothing fit for celebrities along with Emelda Marcos like collection of shoes. I was never more excited to see new accessories that I could add to my Barbie collection. My favorite aisle in the toy store was where pink greeted me.

It’s true that I outgrew my Barbies. But I’m a rat pack. I hate to throw things away no matter how useless they are to me know, how broken they are, or how unfixable they are. It didn't matter. I always thought I maybe I would want to play with them again. My possessiveness extends to all my belongings. Even though I've learnt to let out of my Barbies and other toys of childhood, I still had a certain attachment to them. I argued that nobody would care for my toys like I did. Nobody could love and nurture it like I had done for so long. Therefore, I had sole ownership no matter who owned it now.

A couple of months ago, my mom decided to give my Barbies to my cousins. I felt letdown by the decision when my possessiveness took over, and for a moment, I hated the idea of giving away something that I had for so long. She had every right to because I didn’t play with them anymore. Still, it hurt that I they won’t belong to me anymore. It hurt that my cousins won't know how much, and to what lengths, I would play with my Barbies. How I hated that someone else might now know how much I had cared for my toys or how much fun I had playing with them. They had never known that, and they can't appreciate my Barbies worth to me. I didn't want my Barbies to be just another toy to them. They meant so much to me, and I hoped that my Barbies means as much as to them as my Barbies were to me. My Barbies were like second friends to me. When I had girls come over, that's the main attraction. I had a whole bunch of Barbies we could play with.

Barbies were my friends. They became a connection back to my childhood. A place I think about often. (Usually, I think about how my inexperience with the world is astounding to me, now at 20.) It’s hard to finally cut that away from your life. My Barbies are gone; they are off to live in another countries, in another girl's life.