Oh my god, this blog is still going

I guess the Internet is forever because I had a case of nostalgia and came to take a look at this blog and... I really like this me. I mean I really hate real life me.

After 5 year absence from blogging, and I'm rereading myself, I'm like, "that girl...is not me AT ALL." I'm getting that itch again to do something productive, and blogging seem to be the next best thing to ACTUALLY doing something.

So, I guess an update so far: still the same. Really, you're thinking something must have happened in 5 years since this blog's last post. But not really. I mean, I got my own apartment that I'm finally clearing of clutter after 5 years. I got a new cat a couple of years ago. I'm still lost as always...

fedex guy, you're a dick

that's all.

blah blah blah

So, here I am again.  Um, it's been a couple of days.  Still trying to live up to the promise of posting everyday.  So, where am I now?  Finally caught up with all the work.  Yeah, been up all night trying to do a report.  Bur I'm  done for now.  Still got another 3 of these to do.  Damn.

On another front, I caught up!!!!!  That's a real change of pace.  I can get ahead.  But really, do you see me doing that?  When has that ever happened?

So bored.  I need to figure out what to cook.  So bore with food lately.  I need to come up with next month's menu. 

2nd week

I keep forgetting to post everyday like I said I would. 

Well guess what.  I renegade on a meeting today.  Was iffy on going anyways.  Didn't have motivation.  I really need to push myself to go.  I'm fighting against myself to get me to go...get what I'm sayin? 

Well.  What else is new?  I'm having group jitter nerves.  I hope its not so bad.  I want to do a project that  is online mostly.  I don't really want to have to go somewhere to volunteer.  Just something we can all do online independently.

And I'm falling behind on assignments again.  Well, ideally, I'd like to get ahead.  I was kinda ahead.  But now I'll only have 1 week to write it.  But I got some idea and books.  So, the hardest part is putting it together.  Which is always the hardest part of the writing process-writing the words itself.

But I'm getting up and getting dressed like I have somewhere to go...Well, I'll find somewhere to go eventually.  It's just so damn hot all the time. 

first week

Phew. First half of the week is finished. Blah. My class got cancelled and I had to transfer to a new one on the fly. One that I obviously didn't want in the first place. So, I hope it doesn't come back to bite me.

Still waiting for my books.

So busy. Getting my advising worked out.

So hot. Had to walk half way across campus. I'm pretty sure I'm getting sunburned. Had to fish my old hat out of the back of my closet.

What else? SO many group projects. GAH. But I can't avoid them. Need to get used to working in teams because that's how things get done in the real world. I guess that's why it's so emphasized. But it's a pain in the butt to work with t random people. But 90% of the time people are game and they are in the same boat and really just want things to work out. That's my hope anyways. Only had about 2 bad groups in about 10. That's a good percentage right? 20% ...

My hope is I develop discipline. I really need that. But I always fail. I'm going to try really hard to minimize distracting time. Well, as I'm typing this I'm watching Psych so...

I'm scared of the future. I suck at it. How can I avoid it?

1st day of semester

So, all the things I've accomplished today:

I went to a club meeting. They seem nice, but that's never been my problem. My problem is not they people aren't nice, it's that I'd rather just stay in and not rock my boat too much.

2nd: I went to see my advisor to fix my class schedule and ask about graduation. Need to talk to another advisor about that graduation thing.

3rd: about that meeting. Fun, but still makes me nervous. I went once. Do I have the courage to go again. Let's see how courageous I am next week.

4th: I went to the bookstore. Didn't buy any of the books because I was not prepared. So I'll have to go back again...

5th: Researched some book prices online. Still have not finished.

Maybe I'm tired. But I feel awful right now.

ok so hear goes

Since it's the new semester, and I'm feeling some sense of renew hope, I'm going to try to write a post everyday. Like a journal. Just as boring. Hopefully, it can help alleviate some fears I have.

My first fear is that I can't figure out which section of my required class should I take. It's like choosing between being burned alive and being skinned alive. Both so bad. I don't know what's worse. I could attend both sections and sort of shop the classes. But then I would have to explain to my 2nd section why I'm not registered in that section yet.

Jeez. I'm making this more complicated than it has to be I think.

How about instead of worrying I give a more positive attitude like it doesn't matter, and I can conquer either class? Shouldn't that be my view always? Shouldn't I be comfortable. It's my worldview. Why can't I do whatever? I'm always so negative all the time.

I'm going to write down something positive thing I did or that happen to me so I can remind myself of it.

So let's start off today? What is one good thing that happened to me? Hmm... Ok it's not a guarantee, but I went to my ad visor to get the balls rollin' on graduation. It's positive because I didn't sit on my butt till the last minute to do it. I went today instead of tomorrow. That's something good right?

I just realized its' called a song of ice and fire...

so some progress

So I did something today. I finally signed up for my 3rd class, which I needed to graduate. So 10 days and counting till the semester starts. I still hate my schedule. Not sure if I really want to take these classes. But I'm graduating, so I don't have much room. Still have to check on my financial aid and renew my health insurance. But all of that can wait right?

I'm been on A Song of Fire and Ice binged this summer. It was a nice distraction though.

All those things I wanted to do during the summer...yeah well, I didn't cross that many off my list. Surprise! Nothing changes. But it won't change if I don't. I have to move my feet a little.

10 days left

10 days left till school again. God. I can't believe the summer's gone this quickly. And I did nothing. Again. Except I read A Song of Fire and Ice. Glad I got that out of the way. And what else? Oh, yeah I decided it would be much better if I wrote my feelings out again. I was probably happier when I was doing something with the blog. So, here we go again. Again. Again.

One minute I'm happy. One minute I'm sad. Same as usual.

Still undecided what classes I'm going to take. Yeah with 10 days left...Well, I'll decided tomorrow tomorrow...

Ever since I started with blog, and nothing's improve. I keep writing about the same things over and over again. No matter what I want to do, I still do the opposite.